One of my favorite things as a coach is seeing couples work out together. I love the idea that health and fitness is valued in a relationship and it is something enjoyed together. It is a wonderful way for couples to inspire and encourage each other and to give each other the gift of more happy, healthy years together.
But, working out together isn’t always so easy. And, to be frank, some couples are better at it than others.
At my gym I see a few different types of scenarios:
Overprotective Guy & Annoyed Gal – Guys are built to protect women. They just are. Some of them, however, are better at mediating their caveman ways than others. When I see couples in this scenario the guy is typically trying to teach his girlfriend/wife how to do all the movements, handing her the lightest weights, and over-coaching her. She then gets annoyed and tries to ignore him, which only causes him to coach more.
In general when I see this couple, I send them to opposite ends of the room and tell him he’s not allowed to coach her anymore. He’ll spend the rest of the workout peering over his shoulder checking on her and she’ll spend the rest of the workout oblivious to his presence in the room.
Bad-Ass Chica & Frequently Injured Guy – Like I said, I love couples who share a love for working out and especially the intense working out that comes with CrossFit. As anyone who follows CrossFit knows, though, there are women who really take to it and excel. Personally I think this has something to do with women not growing up trying to “muscle” their way through things and focusing instead on technique and finesse. On the flip side, guys with athletic backgrounds will come in with mobility issues and injuries and want to use heavy weights even when it’s not yet appropriate. They let their egos come into play a little more than women do.
So with these couples, when the girlfriends or wives start kicking major butt…suddenly we start seeing the guys less and less often. The female becomes hooked and the guy has too much work, too many injuries, or has another sport he wants to focus on. These are the sort of couples I think are actually best not working out together. Sometimes a thing is best shared by doing it separately.
Wonder Woman & Superman – I love these couples. These are the couples who are competitive, but in a supportive and productive way. They drive each other to be superheroes and are inspired by each other’s accomplishments. Sure, they probably talk some mad smack over the dinner table, but they do it because they love working out and they know it’s about having fun and becoming better athletes. They know their partner’s success is not a statement about them, instead they treat it with admiration. And on the days when we do partner or team workouts and these couples work out as a unit – all bets are off because their superpowers magnify when they are a unified front!
What’s even better is when these superhero couples bring their future firebreathers to my children’s classes. The only thing better than seeing a couple work out together in a positive, productive manner is seeing a whole family make it a priority and have FUN!
Do you work out with your significant other? Do you see yourself in one of these descriptions? Maybe you are not too excited about how things currently are when you work out with your girlfriend or boyfriend, but it doesn’t have to be that way. With some communication and reminding ourselves that other people’s successes don’t mean anything about us – that we can all succeed and the comparisons we imagine are only in our minds – then we can truly enjoy prioritizing health and fitness in our lives and share it with the people most important to us. The people with whom we’re actually going to share all these hard earned healthy happy years.
